My mother is beautiful. OK, I am biased but aren't all children? We believe our mother is the most beautiful woman in the world. Looking at pictures of my mother as a teen, young woman and beyond, you will see that she was always perfectly coiffed, a beautiful face enhanced by makeup with stylish clothes and shoes. Always. Even when money was tight, there was always a couple of dollars to maintain our exterior beauty.
My mother is beautiful on the inside as well. Always caring for others, helping her parents as they aged, volunteering at church, taking care of our family. She has a big heart and a big smile which makes her extra beautiful.
Over the past several years, she has been ill and landed in the hospital on several occasions. The first item I would bring to her was her eyebrow pencil. Not her cell phone. Not her wallet. Her eyebrow pencil. You see, my mother's god given beauty didn't involve a lot of eyebrow hairs and she has always penciled them in perfectly. And it has become a little joke between us that she looks sick until she puts on her eyebrows. She always humors me and pencils them in, then she looks like mom.
As a variety of neurological issues slowly steal my mother's memory and desire to maintain her beauty, I remain a steadfast soldier in the fight to keep her beauty routine alive! We make sure she gets her hair done every week, even though she sleeps on it and flattens the back. We make sure she has stylish clothing and shoes to wear, even though they need to be practical and comfortable. She gets manicures and pedicures on a regular basis, even though her nails are shorter. And I make sure she has eyebrows, the frame for her beautiful face and eyes. She may not always want to apply her makeup or remember which lotion comes first, but she can draw on her eyebrows like a celebrity makeup artist.
It would be easy to give up and not maintain mom's beauty routine. Her doctors insist that it's best to keep her as active as we can in activities she always enjoyed. I am sure they were referring to shopping and travelling but for me its important that she continues to look like mom.
My father, as her primary caregiver, loves her regardless of makeup, hair and clothing. They have been married 54 years and have seen the good, the bad and the ugly. God bless him and all care-givers, their job is a challenging one. Making sure she is safe and clean are his top priorities.
My priority is beauty therapy. When I visit, I make sure mom has eyebrows and perhaps a little lipstick. I fluff up the back of her hair and review her clothes and shoes. I exasperate my father when I start changing her top or switching her shoes for a more stylish outfit. Her appearance is important to me and its important to her, even if she can't or won't communicate that. My mom is still here and stylish.
Don't we all feel better and stand a little taller when we have taken care of ourselves? Sometimes its simply a shower after a long hard day. Sometimes it’s a new outfit or new pair of shoes. And sometimes, it’s the little things, like penciling in eyebrows and applying a little lipstick that puts the spark back into your soul!
Wishing you peace, love and sparks. Deb
Deb Wilber is the owner of Real Life Spark, a coaching practice dedicated to Igniting the Next Generation of YOU!™